E-couples part 2

If there is anything in the world that makes me want to go on a baby panda punching spree, it's reblogging about the same bullshit I blogged about previously. This blog was supposed to be about epeens, but noooooooooooooooo!!!

So, why am I once again pissy? Because last night's raid was essentially fucked because of our "lovely" kissy-face-diabetic-coma-vomit-inducing couple who decided not to show up. It sucks because they're a tank/healer combo. Damn them! So, instead of starting on time, we start 45 minutes late. It's usually not a big deal, but many of us had other raids scheduled or cancelled plans to simply be there. And yes, I gave up bar time in order to be there. I repeat--BAR TIME. Also, I'm out of vodka at home, so bar time is a huge fucking deal. Long story short, we had to find replacements which made us start late, which in turn seriously cut down on the amount of time we could spend per boss. During the last raid session, I had to endure this shit before each boss pull:

Hee hee, I took screenshots this time around. Instance #1 was right before Marrowgar. Not a good way to set the mood before getting down to business. Hell, I was trying to set a fun mood after setting down a fish feast. But that lovey shit put me in foul-ass mood. It wasn't a one time thing either! Instance #2 was right before Ugly Orc Fuckhead, erm...I mean, Saurfang. By that point I was starting to loose vision in my left eye from the saccharine dripping emotes in my chatbox...gangrene was starting to set into my left pinky toe....Yet the onslaught continued! Instance #3 was right before Rotface, where we not surprisingly wiped because the constant distraction and the tank's apparent inability to kite mobs. It must be nice to have a boyfriend that carries you through content.

Fast forward to last night. They don't show up, we run ridiculously late, and only manage to down Rotface and make 3 attempts on Putricide. THREE FUCKING ATTEMPTS!!!! Now, why so many attempts? Our main tank had to learn how to operate the abomination suit in the cuddle-monkey's absence, and our replacement off tank had not successfully tanked this fight previously (thankfully she learned quickly. yay.). One boss down and only 3 attempts on another makes me want to punch a baby seal right in the face.

Moral of the story--if you're not going to show up to a raid, message one of us. Otherwise, you're wasting the time of everyone involved and it's fucking rude. If you are going to dick around before a boss fight, at least make it amusing. Like so:

Like banishing the healer to the short bus...erm, boat. Or teabagging people that are AFK.

And THIS never gets old:

MY EPEEN IS BIGGER THAN YOURS!!!!

Entertainment is a must for these kinds of things. Otherwise, mind your shit lest you be prepared to be stabbed in the gooch with a rusted spork in the middle of the night by a half-rabid drunken nightelf coming after you screeching like Courtney Love only to meld back into the shadows after showing your no-no squares no mercy.